I'm trying to think what would be on mine -- probably "Volunteer complains about not knowing what's happening, despite not having come to last three meetings," and "SemiCanadian has cat problems," and "City rep calls disavowing responsibility," and "Dead tree falls in parking lot."

(All the cedar trees have a fungus, this summer, which means we periodically have large branches thudding to the ground outside. If you're thinking this makes things a lot more exciting than I would like, you are correct.)