Overheard

[resonant]

Pastor Fixit: "Here's a Lent calendar for you."
The White Sheep: "Is it going to be depressing?"
Pastor Fixit: "Yeah. He still dies in the end."

Kidlet, looking at mirror on floor: "Oh, look! A door into another dimension!"



Choirmaster: "Where can I stick the handbells?"

At a restaurant: a waitress, with both hands full, kicks a dropped knife across a tile floor. Imagine the sound.

Me: "Why'd you make so many different kinds of Christmas cookies?"
The White Sheep: "I thought I'd stop after one, and then I thought, hey, I'm already butt-deep in flour."

At choir: "I first put on a choir robe when I was fourteen. I have no Sunday clothes."

Kidlet: "You'll get home just in time to do homework."
Friend: "Oh, no. I hope I drop dead. No, wait. I hope I drop asleep."

Kidlet invents a word: idiosyncronym. (They were actually trying to say analogy, but we decided that an idiosyncronym is a word that has meaning only to you.)

I buy the spouse a pair of those fingerless gloves with the attached mitten-like cover that you can flip over your fingers. He says: "I love these things. You just flip the top back and you can use your fingers. I think this is how it must feel to be a cat."

Me: "Wonder who put the 'grim' in 'pilgrim'?"
Spouse: "I think it was Nathaniel Hawthorne."

Spouse: "I need more crackers. I can't grade this paper without crackers."

At the church office: "And I look at the volunteer board and there's dead people on it."

At the coffee shop: "We broke all these cups. It was like the Great Cup Massacre of 2007."

Me: "You're very silly."
Kidlet: "I can't help it. It's my heritage."

At the coffee shop:
"Elephants are awful."
"Elephants are obtrusive and big."

"This is different. This was written by an old dude."



Guess I should introduce the White Sheep next. She's the Christian Education director: A nice young woman who's apparently from a very naughty family. Her conversation is peppered with phrases like "my mother's fifth husband ..." and "the last time I talked to my sister when she was sober ..."

edited 2020 to retroactively correct the kidlet's gender pronouns

Comments

[binkii822.livejournal.com]

Lollerskates!

I work in a presbyterian church too, though admittedly I teach preschool, so less church staff, more the church writes my pay checks - but the behind the scenes debacles and comments I run across are always a hoot

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

There's a surprising amount of wackiness in a church office. And then there was the day when a funeral was happening, and I went downstairs to put out some copies of the sermon the way I always do and there was a dead body in a coffin in the entryway!