Things I have texted to my kid recently

[resonant]

(Those of you with toddlers/preschoolers might be reassured to learn that the future does hold hope for conversations in which both parties have something to say other than "No!")

I don't want to suggest to yr teenage friends that substances will solve social problems but caffeine is what I have instead of a personality

Hey! U hv to accept us being dorks! We were born this way!

Def Slytherclaw. & u?

8:15 & all is whupcreams

V impressive horns r they heavy?

It's the most premature time of the year (with photo of Christmas wreaths)

R u sufficiently interested n apple crisp to help peel?

I think normal ppl don't txt "sufficiently"

I don't think it works like that. You have only one uterine lining to give for your country.

When you say a lot do u mean often or intensely?

Acrylic floor polish apparently obsolete. Menard's recommends this.

Because you're deep underground?

Hope tchr conf went ok pls do litter boxes ilu

Comments

[sapote]

... Is she into Homestuck now?

[sapote]

(I ask because it's one of four possible contexts for a teenager having impressive horns)

[resonant]

Loki, actually!

[quinfirefrorefiddle]

How many uterine linings was she expecting to give for her country?

[china_shop]

R u sufficiently interested n apple crisp to help peel?

I think normal ppl don't txt "sufficiently"

Hee! Love the negative space here. <3

[mergatrude]

♥

[karmageddon]

Wait . . WHAT DO THEY DO WITH THE UTERINE LININGS? OMG

[out_there]

When you say a lot do u mean often or intensely?


That is my favourite. It doesn't get specified enough.

[resonant]

Her periods aren't regular yet, and she has a superstitious belief that they're cumulative -- that if you don't menstruate for three months, then on the fourth month you're going to shed four months' worth of blood.

Honestly the first period after pregnancy sure feels like nine months' worth, but I didn't tell her that!

[resonant]

I wonder how many of these exchanges actually amuse her and how many of them have her rolling her eyes at her friend: My mother, at it again.

[resonant]

Back atcha!

[resonant]

I was telling quin above: Her periods aren't regular yet, and she has a superstitious belief that they're cumulative -- that if you don't menstruate for three months, then on the fourth month you're going to shed four months' worth of blood.

[resonant]

I'm big into defining your terms. Anybody would be, if they'd grown up with my dad ...

[metaphortunate]

That is encouraging, thank you. :)