Res ipsa loquitur

I would have sworn that I had heard all the heaven-and-hell jokes there were, but I had never heard that one.

A preacher skips church to play golf, and St. Paul calls St. Peter over and says, "What's the proper punishment for this?"

Peter waves his hand, and the golf ball sails through the air and lands right in the cup.

Paul says, "You punished him by giving him a hole in one?"

Peter says, "Who can he tell?"