Four truths
Oct. 4th, 2003 01:10 amNow that I think of it, this meme is a test of me as a fiction writer -- of how well I understand the character called Resonant, and how good I am at writing things that are in character for her, and how good y'all are at spotting things that are out of character for her.
I've RPF'd myself.
I've talked to J.J. Sedelmaier (the Ambiguously Gay Duo animator) on the phone.
True.
That one's sort of a gimme, I suppose; he's not exactly a household name, so it's unlikely I'd know his name (much less be able to spell it) if I didn't have some connection to him.
I interviewed him by phone a couple of years ago because one of our magazines gave him an award for some Levi's ads he animated. We don't have cable, so I wasn't aware that his MTV stuff was famous until afterwards; if I had been, I'd have been a lot more nervous. He was a nice guy, and very funny, but he talked really, really fast.
When I was a kid, I was such a goody-goody that I used to change the lyrics of Christmas carols so I wouldn't have to say "ass."
I'm glad so few of you think I could be that pathetic, but alas, it's true.
The phrase "ox and ass" is in the second verse of a lot of Christmas carols*, for some reason, and I would always sing "ox and mule." I don't even remember getting any funny looks for that.
I was profoundly, inexplicably disturbed by profanity as a kid, so much so that I wonder whether maybe I'm blocking out some swearing-related family trauma.
In college, I took an apartment over the most popular bakery in town, but I broke the lease to move out after six months because it was impossible to keep the roaches out.
False. (Don't you know the false one is almost always #3?)
It did happen; just not to me. (Like that Stephen Wright joke: "One time I ... no, wait, that was someone else.")
A girl who lived in my dorm got a job at the bakery, and then when she moved out of the dorm she took the apartment right upstairs. She told me all sorts of horror stories about that bakery -- for instance, what happened when someone forgot to clean out the blender before closing for the night (you don't want to know what they found in it) and what they did about it (rinsed it out with warm water). Cured me of the expensive-brownie habit right quick.
I went to high school with "Bring It On" director Peyton Reed.
Yup. We graduated the same year, though I never knew him very well. He was quite cute (in a scrawny and bespectacled way), extremely intelligent, and somewhat belligerent (the way scrawny bespectacled guys sometimes are).
My only child has the same middle name as my first boyfriend.
True.
The kidlet is not named after him -- they're named after the spouse's grandfather, who turned 100 shortly after they were born -- but it is the same name.
*
isiscolo wants to know which Christmas carols have "ass" in them. I came up with a few examples.
and the second verse of "Away in a Manger":
and the second verse of "On This Day Earth Shall Ring" (which was fun to sing, with the "ideo-o-o" in the chorus):
and the second verse of "Unto Us a Boy is Born" (with that lovely up-and-down-a-five-note-scale on the last syllable):
and the second verse of "Venite Adoremus Dominum" (which I especially adored because it has this glorious descant):
(I confess that I had to consult the hymnal for several of those, but I did sing them as a child, and I did substitute "mule" for each and every "ass.")
edited 2020 to retroactively correct the kidlet's gender pronouns
I've RPF'd myself.
I've talked to J.J. Sedelmaier (the Ambiguously Gay Duo animator) on the phone.
True.
That one's sort of a gimme, I suppose; he's not exactly a household name, so it's unlikely I'd know his name (much less be able to spell it) if I didn't have some connection to him.
I interviewed him by phone a couple of years ago because one of our magazines gave him an award for some Levi's ads he animated. We don't have cable, so I wasn't aware that his MTV stuff was famous until afterwards; if I had been, I'd have been a lot more nervous. He was a nice guy, and very funny, but he talked really, really fast.
When I was a kid, I was such a goody-goody that I used to change the lyrics of Christmas carols so I wouldn't have to say "ass."
I'm glad so few of you think I could be that pathetic, but alas, it's true.
The phrase "ox and ass" is in the second verse of a lot of Christmas carols*, for some reason, and I would always sing "ox and mule." I don't even remember getting any funny looks for that.
I was profoundly, inexplicably disturbed by profanity as a kid, so much so that I wonder whether maybe I'm blocking out some swearing-related family trauma.
In college, I took an apartment over the most popular bakery in town, but I broke the lease to move out after six months because it was impossible to keep the roaches out.
False. (Don't you know the false one is almost always #3?)
It did happen; just not to me. (Like that Stephen Wright joke: "One time I ... no, wait, that was someone else.")
A girl who lived in my dorm got a job at the bakery, and then when she moved out of the dorm she took the apartment right upstairs. She told me all sorts of horror stories about that bakery -- for instance, what happened when someone forgot to clean out the blender before closing for the night (you don't want to know what they found in it) and what they did about it (rinsed it out with warm water). Cured me of the expensive-brownie habit right quick.
I went to high school with "Bring It On" director Peyton Reed.
Yup. We graduated the same year, though I never knew him very well. He was quite cute (in a scrawny and bespectacled way), extremely intelligent, and somewhat belligerent (the way scrawny bespectacled guys sometimes are).
My only child has the same middle name as my first boyfriend.
True.
The kidlet is not named after him -- they're named after the spouse's grandfather, who turned 100 shortly after they were born -- but it is the same name.
*
Good Christian friends, rejoice,
With heart and hand and voice.
Give ye heed to what we say,
Jesus Christ is born today!
Ox and ass before him bow,
and he is in the manger now.
and the second verse of "Away in a Manger":
Why lies he in such mean estate
where ox and ass are feeding?
and the second verse of "On This Day Earth Shall Ring" (which was fun to sing, with the "ideo-o-o" in the chorus):
His the doom, ours the mirth;
When he came down to earth,
Bethlehem saw his birth.
Ox and ass beside him
From the cold would hide him.
and the second verse of "Unto Us a Boy is Born" (with that lovely up-and-down-a-five-note-scale on the last syllable):
Cradled in a stall was he
with sleepy cows and asses;
but the very beasts could see
that he all men surpa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-asses.
and the second verse of "Venite Adoremus Dominum" (which I especially adored because it has this glorious descant):
'Twas Mary, daughter pure
of holy Anne
that brought into the world
the God made man.
She laid him in a stall
at Bethlehem;
the ass and oxen shared
the roof with him.
(I confess that I had to consult the hymnal for several of those, but I did sing them as a child, and I did substitute "mule" for each and every "ass.")
edited 2020 to retroactively correct the kidlet's gender pronouns
(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 10:45 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 10:55 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 10:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 10:48 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 11:16 am (UTC)"Deck the halls, and start a-bitching,
Fa la la la la, la la la la!
My gift shorts scratch - my ass is itching,
Fa la la la la, la la, la la!"
Or perhaps
"On the first day of Christmas, what would I like to see?
A naked ass under my tree!"
Just suggestin'...
(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 11:32 am (UTC)"God rest ye merry, gentlemen
And sit your asses down..."
(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 10:50 am (UTC)it's so much fun to blur that line....
(no subject)
Date: 10/9/03 12:21 pm (UTC)[fails]
and the second verse of "Away in a Manger":
Why lies he in such mean estate
where ox and ass are feeding?
That's the second verse of "What Child Is This?"
[has sung Christmas carols in quartets since she was 14, and deeply wishes on some days that she didn't know all five verses to Good King Wenceslas. Which doesn't contain an ass, unless you count Mr. Smug King himself]
(no subject)
Date: 10/14/03 02:12 pm (UTC)I still can't handle that song, because when I was a kid, my mom decided to sing it as "Señor Wences-las", and I've never gotten over the funny.
Señor Wences-las looked out--
S'alright? S'alright.
--On the feast of Stephen...
(no subject)
Date: 10/11/03 05:25 pm (UTC)I'd always change "He descended into Hell, and on the third day he rose to heaven" to "He descended to the dead"-- the book did offer it as an alternative. I was kind of shocked the adults in my church didn't bat an eye at the profanity.
(no subject)
Date: 11/20/03 05:33 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 12/6/03 11:18 pm (UTC)No one else knows this carol. I love it.
That is all.