Podslash

Why I Don't Record A Podslash, Even Though Secretly I Believe I Have A Sexy Speaking Voice: A Dramatic Demonstration

The scene: Ballet school, parents' waiting room.

The characters:
Res, who leads a daring secret life as a pornographic media pirate
Lucia, the kidlet's ballet classmate, whose name is pronounced the Castilian way, Lu-THEE-a
Carmen, Lucia's mother, who is from Madrid
Fernando, Lucia's father, who is from Venezuela

Res: Thanks for lending us the books. The kidlet really enjoyed them.
Lucia: [without the slightest trace of an accent] What about the chicken book? They might like the chicken book.
Carmen: Yes, the chicken book! It is about one chicken who have one daughter, and she search far and wide to find for her daughter the very best husband of all, you see? And she find kings and heroes, and her daughter may marry any of them, you see, but in the end her daughter marry one -- chicken? one male chicken is in English what?
Res: A rooster.
Carmen: One rooster, yes, but that is not the word I am thinking of. There is another word?
Res: Cock, but that has some slang problems. [blushes furiously and hopes no one notices]
Fernando: That is perhaps from French? Cockerel?
Res: Oh, yes! Let's talk about French.