Overheard and overseen and etc.

[resonant]

Cleaned out half the garage today, including removing twelve 40-pound bags of landscaping rock left over from a project that happened fifteen years ago. It's like homeowners' amnesia. You haven't forgotten that this stuff is there, exactly; you've just forgotten that it has anything to do with you.

Also mowed the lawn. I really don't think that any week ought to have both snow flurries and lawn-mowing in it.

Here's the latest set of overheards.

"I put it in some perfectly sensible place. Drat. Foiled again by my past self overestimating my present self's intelligence." -- kidlet



"My parents were only nineteen when they had me. I think I was their high school science experiment."

"You remember when I was twelve years old and you said one day I'd appreciate this? I still don't appreciate this."

"You guys don't realize it, but I'm drunk at work every day."
"Oh, I realize it."

"My suicide letter is going to be addressed to Starbucks."

"Don't come up here, or else I'll name your cranium." -- kidlet to cat

Text exchange:
Me: Txt me back pls. Tryng to figure out why i keep missing txts.
Kidlet: Hi.
Me: Thx. Vibrate is just v quiet.
Kidlet: Ya. I keep mine n my bra.

"There's a difference between not being able to handle reality and not being able to handle Chicago."

"Consistency is what were afraid of."

"They've taken all the nutritional value out of it. So it's not bad."

"And the newspaper is now saying it's going to redesign to be more 'edgy.'"
"Edgy. Right. So it will be like 'Hurray for the fucking status quo.'"

Spouse: "How much weather can we have?!"

Pastor Dad: "I have a credential that allows me to teach philosophy in the state of California, and it's for life. So if I lose my mind, I can still teach philosophy in the state of California."
The White Sheep: "It might be an advantage."

Watching TV in the hotel is a learning experience for a person without cable.
Me: "Wait, wait, I wasn't paying attention. Did that woman seriously just call the monster 'sheepsquatch'?"
Kidlet, in an explanatory tone: " 'murika."



And in apology for never posting any fannish content ever, this is what I'm working on now:

Item. There's nothing strange in a good-looking fellow having a lot of sex with a lot of different women, none of whom he introduces to his flatmate.

Note: For christ's sake, this is Sherlock Holmes we're talking about.

Comments

[out_there]

Note: For christ's sake, this is Sherlock Holmes we're talking about.

*snerk* Sometimes, context is a good thing.

With most of the quotes above that, though, it works fine without context at all. *g*

[resonant]

Context os for people who actually finish things occasionally.

[blueraccoon]

Foiled again by my past self overestimating my present self's intelligence.

This happens to me ALL THE TIME.

[amberfox]

Alas. The days when you can't find something and all you can remember is that you put it somewhere that made perfect sense so you'd be able to find it easily. And you have no idea where that place was.

[petra]

My phrase for this is "I must have done something clever with it."

[blueraccoon]

My usual response is "I'm not as smart as I thought I was."

[resonant]

I know, right! My past self also overestimates my present self's memory; often the only thing I can remember is myself confidently saying, "Oh, I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."

[china_shop]

"Edgy. Right. So it will be like 'Hurray for the fucking status quo.'"

HEE! Awesome!

[resonant]

Also, what newspapers think of as edgy is always laughably far behind the times -- like they're just now getting around to noticing lolcats, which the rest of the internet (except for me) is already bored with.

[happydork]

Just skating by on /network.

"Edgy. Right. So it will be like 'Hurray for the fucking status quo.'"

Perfect!

[resonant]

The Onion is much funnier, I think, for people who have worked at newspapers, because it captures perfectly that mixed blandness, marketing-speak, and cosmopolitan above-all-this that makes up the language of the American newspaper.

[julad]

"There's a difference between not being able to handle reality and not being able to handle Chicago." -- there is something really freaking profound about this.

Also, stuck on THE KIDLET HAS A BRA?

[anatsuno]

hahah, I had the same reaction. :D Then I was like. "oh right. time passing and all that."

[resonant]

The kidlet's bra size is now bigger than mine.

[celli]

"There's a difference between not being able to handle reality and not being able to handle Chicago."

SING IT.

[resonant]

Chicago was the first big city I ever went to (I went to college in the 'burbs), and sometimes I wonder what my life would have been like if I'd chosen San Francisco or Boston or, I don't know, someplace where the wind won't take the top layer of skin off, someplace that smells a little less of piss?

[jesse_the_k]

"Homeowner's Amnesia" is such a thing.

We also enjoyed snow and 50° this week, but only fertilized.

I am very very excited about your fannish content.

[resonant]

In a similar vein is Homeowner's Inversion, where, when you smell something dead, you go looking for it.