The myopic leading the blind

[resonant]

Until I started reading HP, I'd never been involved in a fandom in which one of the characters wore glasses.

It's becoming increasingly obvious to me that most of the writers do not wear glasses.

I'm nearsighted and astigmatic, and I've been wearing glasses since I was 24. For the benefit of HP writers who are cursed with perfect vision, here are a few observations about glasses that you might find useful in your next story.

1. If I kissed you while I was wearing my glasses, they would quickly become covered with smears of grease from your face and mine. It's kind of disgusting. Plus, a passionate kiss would push the nosepieces into the bridge of my nose in a rather uncomfortable way.

If I'm going to deliver any kiss beyond a quick goodbye peck, I always take my glasses off first.

2. If I had sex with you while wearing my glasses, then I'd have the abovementioned nosepiece problem, only much, much worse. If I lay on my side or pressed my face against a pillow (or against your smooth, strong thighs), the earpieces would press inward against my temples or outward against the backs of my ears, which is quite uncomfortable. And they'd probably get bent out of shape, too, so that they'd be uncomfortable to wear afterwards until I could manage to take them to the optician for adjustment. They might even get bent enough to pop a lens out.

Plus: Within a couple of minutes they'd be so smeared that I wouldn't be able to see through them anyway.

If I'm going to be having sex, I take my glasses off. And I put them in a safe place, far, far away. This is so that a flailing hand can't knock them from the nightstand onto the bed, where they might be rolled over upon and smooshed.

3. My vision is moderately bad -- I can't legally drive with uncorrected vision -- but I'm not blind without my glasses. I can read and write and carry on conversations without them.

Out to about eighteen inches from my face, things are just as clear to me without glasses as with them. From eighteen inches out to arm's length, things are still pretty clear -- I can easily distinguish facial expressions from that distance, and I can read my laptop screen without my glasses if I squint a bit. This means that I don't need to wear my glasses to bed in order to see the look of passion and adoration on my lover's face.

If I knew you well, I'd be able to recognize you from across the room without my glasses (though I probably couldn't tell if you were winking at me).

So there you go. Now I don't want to read any more stories where Harry keeps his glasses on while giving head because he wants to be able to see what he's doing, all right?

Comments

[rusty76.livejournal.com]

Hear, hear!

My vision is about the same as yours, it sounds like - and that's always bugged me when I read the above mentioned situations. Not to mention I've never yet read anywhere a description of Harry having to clean his glasses.

hee!

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

I got my first pair of bifocals at three, thankyouverymuch. :-) Two eye surgeries corrected the lazy eye and astigmatism -- and then we discovered I was nearsighted. So, glasses, indeed.

I don't read any HP that's not penned by friends, for the most part, so I've sailed blissfully along without having to endure descriptions of Harry giving head with his glasses on. //shudder// :-) Sometimes it's nice not to be reading much fanfic; at least I'm missing the truly bad stuff...

[amberfox.livejournal.com]

I've been wearing glasses since I was 8, and I probably would need glasses to see what I was doing while giving head if I actually needed to see. *shrug* But yeah, glasses and sex don't really mix. Get that boy some contacts, or a corrective charm, or /something/ if his eyesight is so bad he can't even have sex without his glasses.

[darthfox.livejournal.com]

[blink]

i'm sure i've seen that icon somewhere before ...

[amberfox.livejournal.com]

*blush* I swiped it from you, sorry; I needed one to complete my set! *blinks innocently* Do you mind?

preach it!

[darthfox.livejournal.com]

i normally wear contacts, but i'm not blind without those, either. only trouble was last week when one of them packed it in and quit working -- the resulting half-clear vision was a challenge. so until the new contacts come in, i've been wearing my glasses daily, and everything you've just said is true. (in fact, if i'm going to be having sex, i take my contacts out, because having an issue with one of those suckers could definitely Ruin a Moment.)

[axiom_of_stripe]

huh. although most of my friends and family members wear glasses, i don't, and i'd never really thought much about the mechanics of it all. this is quite useful knowledge, and duly noted.

...not that i'm thinking of finishing that harry-and-draco-make-out-in-the-chamber-of-secrets story. just, i mean, it's generally useful knowledge. for, um, other characters. like...let's see...thatcher wears glasses, doesn't she? and kowalski, of course. right, there you have it!

:)

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

.thatcher wears glasses, doesn't she? and kowalski, of course.

Kowalski only needs his for activities (like sharpshooting) that require long-distance pinpoint accuracy. So unless you're going to write a Target Ejaculation story ...

not that i'm thinking of finishing that harry-and-draco-make-out-in-the-chamber-of-secrets story.

Not that I would dream of pressuring you or any such thing.

[silviakundera.livejournal.com]

I wear glasses half the time (depends if I remember them. I'm terrible about it) and I certainly kiss/make out with them on. But, yes, they would be very much in the way during sex.

Damn. You've made me think about this. Definitely have to remember to mention the care of his glasses in some fics. *smacks self*

[hackthis.livejournal.com]

as another person subjected to corrective-vision implements, i try to remember about the glasses as snogging and glasses so don't mix. although i have to say sleeping with contacts in one's eyes isn't that much better.

[tradescant.livejournal.com]

Speaking as someone who really can't see much beyond blowjob range, I have to say that it's easier for me to take the glasses off than to be able to see. Plus, having sex without glasses raises lots of interesting issues, issues that have to do with relinquishing control and having to rely on tactile and aural cues rather than visual ones; really, sex without glasses is a much more concentrated sensual experience than sex with.

Plus, in my experience, when you keep the glasses on, that's pretty much all you can think about. It's hard to concentrate on anything besides not destroying them.

[bobthetrout.livejournal.com]

I don't wear glasses but I can tell you I damn well used to take my boyfriend's glasses away from him when he tried to kiss me after his frames managed to leave a cut on my eyelid.

[darkrosetiger.livejournal.com]

I am effectively blind without my glasses--the world turns into an Impressionist painting when I take then off. That said, I'd *never* wear my glasses during sex, or during BDSM play. I'm terrified of losing or breaking them, especially since the time I walked into the Atlantic and they got swept out to London. But as someone else mentioned, there is a definite sense of loss of control when I take them off, because without them, I'm almost completely helpless.

[sanj.livejournal.com]

Bless you. Totally. I don't even wear my glasses when I *eat*. You know. Food. :)

Seriously, this is less of a problem in TS, DS, or SG-1, other fandoms with guys who make passes at guys who wear glasses... or maybe I've just managed to avoid those stories over there? Lucky me, if so.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

I don't know about Daniel, but Blair and Ray are both only occasional glasses-wearers, so it doesn't come up much.

And truly, I'm not bothered by stories in which the glasses just Magically Disappear; what bothers me is where it's explicitly mentioned that Harry keeps his glasses on while giving head, or in the steambath, or in other circumstances where glasses would useless or worse.

[aesc.livejournal.com]

I think I've managed to avoid glasses-wearing Harry going down on someone, and I thank God for it. The image is already comical enough... seeing it in practice (I mean in fanfic, not in real life, silly people) would send me over the edge.

I just had a thought (seriously.) If Harry's THAT nearsighted that he needs to keep his glasses on while giving head in order to see what he's doing, he REALLY needs to see Madame Pomfrey. Or whatever is the wizarding equivalent of a qualified opthalmologist. Or, possibly, a psychologist. Something about that is just... odd.

[halimede.livejournal.com]

And they'd probably get bent out of shape, too, so that they'd be uncomfortable to wear afterwards until I could manage to take them to the optician for adjustment.

After my optician told me he'd been adjusting his own glasses since he was eight, I started experimenting a little bit as well, and can now reasonably readjust my own glasses. I see Harry as being self-sufficient enough to do the same (can't imagine aunt Petunia taking him to the optician everytime her little boy whacks Harry's glasses out of shape).

Mind you, that only works for metal frames, plastic needs to be adjusted by a professional, as far as I know.

[viedma.livejournal.com]

i'm so proud. for once, i wrote a HP fic that addressed all of these issues! somewhere in a black hole on my hard drive.

eh. but you know, sometimes the glasses happen to on, and maybe you remember to take them off or maybe you don't. but i'm very hard on my glasses, and wear the sturdy Army frames everywhere when i'm not at work to save the good pair.

Reasonable...

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

But I have given blow-jobs wearing my glasses.

I've kissed a LOT wearing them

I've even had (quickie) sex wearing them.

And they didn't get smudged, broken or bent.

Maybe I'm just not as passionate about these things as our BSO's are?

Now if I'm settling in for a leisurely round of lovemaking on a bed, the glasses are on the dresser.

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

You know. I've kissed quite passionately with my glasses on. In fact, I'd venture to say that I've kissed more often *with* them than without them - and as my husband has far worse vision than I do, I've done this with a man wearing glasses. And, um. They tend to stay on through all the. um. Sweaty bits. And stuff.
blush

Or, part way through, I remember to take them off, and find a place to put them. Sometimes.

Thus far, none of this has done any damage to my glasses. I've done more just by taking naps in them. Which I do.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

I've showered with mine on, but not on purpose.

But for all-around damage to glasses, nothing beats a curious, grabby 18-month-old.

[theodicy.livejournal.com]

I'm smiling an awful lot from this post. Can you see me?

[wingles.livejournal.com]

I realize this thread is ancient, but I'm glad to finally find that someone has adressed this matter. It bothers me most in fanart, maybe, that during passionate sex Harry has his glasses on.

I tend to take my glasses off even for a good snuggle, so that has started to work like a warning signal to my boyfriend, telling him that now snuggling should happen, concentrate. Glasses are very impractical.
The power/control is affected by loss of sight only if they have the lights on.