Missed Romance Opportunities #2: Knot and Tie

[resonant]

Here's another thing that's all very well for porn but has missed opportunities for romance: the a/b/o worldbuilding trope where the alpha penis sometimes has a knot on it, sometimes resulting in two lovers being tied together for a long period of time. The stories I've read have sometimes mentioned this beforehand, in anticipation or dread -- "and then we'll be attached together for the thirty-minute alpha orgasm" -- but when they actually get there, we usually get a few minutes of conversation or dozing followed by a fade to black.

OK, my first thought about this is actually more porn, namely: I want better descriptions of what it's supposed to feel like to have an orgasm that lasts half an hour. (Who was the comedian in the eighties who said, "My mother was in labor with me for 36 hours. I don't even want to do something that feels good for 36 hours"?)

But on the romance side:

- We can just about keep the awkwardness at bay for long enough to have sex, if we do it so fast and intense that nobody has a chance to say something they can't take back. We definitely can't keep the awkwardness at bay while being unbreakably attached to each other for half an hour.

- Now you're attached to me for thirty minutes, and also somewhat debilitated by pleasure, so I think this would be a great time to ask you that question that you always avoid answering.

- Now I'm attached to you for thirty minutes, and also somewhat debilitated by pleasure, and my ability to pretend that this is just meaningless sex is being severely tried.

- I've had bad luck with prior relationships, and my experience of this thirty minutes has been really godawful. I don't know what it's like to experience this with someone I can actually trust.

- I have to make sure this doesn't happen with us; I owe it to you to make sure you can always make a fast getaway and not be stuck with me for half an hour, because nobody would want that.

- Actually I can do it with you. I just have to make sure we're in a position where you can't see my face while it's happening.

- Holy shit, I've never had anybody talk dirty to me for the entire thirty minutes. Uh, that makes it forty-five minutes. My mind is blown.

Comments

[runpunkrun]

I would read any of these.

[resonant]

I would love to have a chance to! The only romantic uses I've seen of knotting are "So you are my mate!" (meh) and "Wow, that's never happened before, sorry" (pretty nice), and so far I've never seen ANY romantic use of the tie.

[runpunkrun]

I haven't seen anything like it either. I don't read a lot of a/b/o, but what I do read often subverts the standard tropes.

[the_shoshanna]

These all sound fantastic.

[resonant]

This isn't a whole story, but I'd also love to see an established relationship knot and tie where, like, they spend the whole time comparing schedules for the upcoming week or telling each other jokes that they've saved up just for that purpose.

[the_shoshanna]

My partner and I would probably just make sure we each had books within reach before the banging commenced.

[resonant]

I can imagine how this would go with a couple who were talkers (assuming that half-hour orgasm is sufficiently low intensity to allow for conversation):

"Your reasoning is circular because -"

[Shift of hips]

[Gasp] "You do not get to bolster a weak argument by making me -" [hiss] "Fine, fine, you win, I'll [gasp] read it."

[anitac588]

hehehehhhehh, this option made me laugh! the realities of life!
(all other options above made me go all yes, yes, gimme, lol)

[ride_4ever]

*points to icon*

[resonant]

The porn I've experienced outside fandom is missing the people element.

[ride_4ever]

So true.

[minoanmiss]

Your icon is gloriously true.

[kass]

I don't read a/b/o but the scenarios you just outlined sound delightful and I would read any of them. :-D

[resonant]

I didn't used to read it and it's still not my favorite but apparently if you read Witcher you are going to read a/b/o whether you like it or not.

[j00j]

Got specific recommendations?

[resonant]

The only one I bookmarked was Silklace's "Snowmelt," which has a delightful filthy tenderness to it, but doesn't spend much time in the tied-together afterglow.

[j00j]

Thanks! I think this one had some of this but you’ve probably seen it https://archiveofourown.org/works/26546356/chapters/64710991

[ellen_fremedon]

This.

[petra]

I love your brain.

[resonant]

It loves you!

[desireearmfeldt]

Good gravy, is that what knotting is? I've managed to avoid learning that until today. :) (Mostly by not reading A/B/O.)

[resonant]

Yep! I have a previously noted appreciation for stories about nonstandard equipment, but I like it to be treated as - not a problem, necessarily, but a puzzle that requires communication to solve. And a lot of fanfic will always default to the IS BIGG treatment instead.

[minoanmiss]

God DAMN it this is the first thing I have eVER seen that made me want to think about a/b/o. conversations while knotted together. I cannot EVEN.

[resonant]

Right? Conversations they can't walk away from! Like you accidentally blurt out "I love you" way too early in the relationship and then you have half an hour to awkwardly backpedal!

Also: nearly impossible to avoid some degree of cuddling.

[rhi]

I have never read any of those either, but wow I want to now!

[resonant]

I mean, I get it -- you couldn't just write an ordinary porn+feelings and then tack thirty minutes tied together, because it would throw your pacing all off. You'd have to change the structure somewhat.

I keep posting stuff like this in the hopes that someone else will write what I want to read.

[mific]

I love these ideas! I seem to revert to crack with ABO stuff. So I'm thinking knotting only happens if the sex is especially good, and it crops up unexpectedly just before one partner has to do a crucial Zoom meeting. Shenanigans ensue both in terms of body positioning, managing the social front while knotted, the one not on Zoom being mischievous, and the need for silence in the off-Zoom partner (kink potential there!) :D

[runpunkrun]

Just a heads up that if you remove the slashes from a/b/o you get a derogatory term for aboriginal people.

[resonant]

Oh, I love the Zoom meeting!

I've seen knotting only happens when the sex is good, and slightly more of knotting only happens when there's a real bond and a lot of trust, both of which I like a lot -- means that that person's body is alien to both of them.

[lemonsharks]

You’ve hit on one of my biggest gripes with a/b/o—don’t fade to black on my emotional payoff!

[resonant]

Mine too!

In fairness that's a gripe I have with a lot of non a/b/o, too.

[lemonsharks]

Hehe

I trimmed down my DNWs this year but "comeshot as climax of story" remains because resolve that emotional tension for me *please*

[jesse_the_k]

Echoing the earlier wise five: write any of these and make us delirious!

[resonant]

See, I keep thinking I can throw these out to the universe and the universe will provide me with the story I want to read and do not want to write!

(Actually I think all of them would be fun to write, but I don't want to create original characters and I can't seem to bond with any fandoms.)

[laurenthemself]

I definitely wrote a scene where the alpha was scrolling Twitter on her phone while the omega took a nap, and I cannot for the life of me find it now; it's not something I've posted. The alpha in question's a short woman and the omega's a tall man, so she was just chilling out using his back as a mattress while he dozed off with his face in a pillow. They'd been together for years.

[resonant]

Aww, that's adorable!

[mergatrude]

I really love the way you think about things. Someone gives you a car and you say, "How about we turn it upside down, then put it in the lake and row to the other side." ♥ ♥ ♥

[resonant]

lol I love this

[marina]

omg yes please to all of these. I will read them in a heartbeat!

[resonant]

I wish it were enough just to have ideas, instead of actually having to write.

[exceptinsects]

I just came across this story after reading this post! Established relationship cozy chatting while tied, with bonus even-more-nonstandard equipment.
(Hockey RPF)

[resonant]

For some reason I have an aversion to hockey fic, but you make a good case for it! I've bookmarked it.

[virtual_particle]

*thousand-yard stare* Huh. I think you just articulated a key reason why I have trouble getting into certain tropes or plot dynamics. When authors fade to black, sometimes important questions go unanswered, and that throws me out of the story. Questions like what do these people even do with themselves for that half hour, how is this a thing

Uhm. So.

I would read all of those in this post. Especially this one: Holy shit, I've never had anybody talk dirty to me for the entire thirty minutes. Uh, that makes it forty-five minutes. My mind is blown
if it involved MCU characters or other superheroes/magic folk so I wouldn't have to wonder about their blood pressure being that high for that long

(Feel free to ignore this comment, ahaha)

Wow ⊙.☉

[barbaratp]

So dear author, I met you at Fanlore, then at AO3 and finally here. I would like to say that I really like your stories (the two I’ve read so far), and that trope over us and moorings was wonderful. It blew my mind because I never thought that and look, I read a lot of books, lots and lots. I would certainly read more than half of that. I hope you are well in the midst of this pandemic period. Total wish for a good life to you.