Random (fandom) observation

[resonant]

Ever notice how, when two guys in a slash story compare cock sizes, the result is always that one's a little longer and the other a little thicker?

Comments

[northern]

Yup. It's so fair it's siropy.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

This made me laugh out loud, because it struck me as such an equitable, maternal thing to do--we split all the good stuff evenly, as it were. It would be fun to do it the other way, though: "Fraser's cock was both longer and thicker than his, and Ray sighed and went to invest in one of those vacuum pumps he'd seen advertised in spam."

Actually, you know, this reminds me of something else: studies have shown that women value the social interaction of play more than men, who value winning more. So women will change the rules of a game to a) prolong the game or b) to make for a more equitable playing field among the players where men are more likely to strictly enforce the rules and win. In practice, this means your dad beats you at chess while your mom changes the rules of monopoly so that she and two children of different ages can all play competitively.

Anyway, it strikes me that's kind of what we're doing with the guys' cocks. Um--not wanting to slow the momentum of the sex scene by constructing a situation in which someone clearly "wins." This may be also why the need for reciprocal fucking--it prolongs "play."

Never mind. That was really clear in my head.

[bethbethbeth.livejournal.com]

"Hey, it's okay, Fraser. No, really, Buddy. I...okay, I know I asked when were you gonna start, but I was...um...kidding. That's it. I was kidding. Bad joke, huh? I knew you were there all the time. Really. I swear. I felt it! Um. A little."

Fraser wept.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Think of the nicknames! I vote for "Needlenose." --Ces, who's twelve

[thermidor.livejournal.com]

But in dS, we have the possibility for extra special anguish as in, "Fraser looked at Ray Kowalski's cock, which neither as long nor as think as Ray Vecchio's".

[millefiori.livejournal.com]

Oh! Cruel!!

[shayheyred.livejournal.com]

Oh! Cruel!!
Not too mention impossible.

[copracat]

So Vecchio really was a clever dick?

[xoverau.livejournal.com]

Anyone who believes that has never seen fifty males in an online RPG like EQ or Shadowbane wank and whine and sob and cry over being fairly bested according to the rules of the game so much that they get them changed to something where basically no one can lose.

Um.

Just sayin'.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Wow--you're right, I have never seen that. That's really really interesting. I wonder if that means that the research is wrong or if "gamers" value the social continuation of play more than the formal rules, as women do.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Wow--you're right, I have never seen that. That's really really interesting. I wonder if that means that the research is wrong or if "gamers" value the social continuation of play more than the formal rules, as women do.

[xoverau.livejournal.com]

I guess, to be fair, I can't say that every single player that complained was male. Some of them may have been disguising their genders. Online, it's hard to tell. But my friend Scott has been part of groups in games that were made up of men he knew personally, and he said it's widespread. It's not considered fun if your character can, for instance, be killed with one shot if surprised, can lose items or money once "dead", doesn't come back after "death" with all his/her statistics the same, can be overpowered by another class of creature, or has to quest for an undue amount of time to get the items or skills desired. Players have successfully complained about dying because they spent points on lots of firepower as a "fighting class" creature and spared nothing for shielding or defense. To me it seems that if you don't have any armor or shielding and you stand in front of a bullet, complaining about dying is just...stupid. Yet the game was modified to make having armor almost meaningless in order to appease the players in question.

[tanzy.livejournal.com]

I played EQ rather intesively for 3 years (along with dozens of other MMORPGs and games), so I can attest to some of these things, but I think the motivations behind the complaining about class balance or risk vs. reward in games like EQ isn't about "prolonging the play" so much as it is about the obtainability of the prize. The people generally complain in EQ when they lose, but not when they win. It's all about trying to win, gain levels, abilities or loot until a player deems the effort required to get those things unreasonable. Only then does it become a complaint about fairness or balance. So the motivation behind such complains is still very much related to wining.

Another example is how many guilds in EQ are structured. Lower level or less intensive guilds ("family guilds") have a relatively high number of female players, while Uber or more high level guilds tend to be mostly populated by men. Family style guilds tend to value interpersonal relationships and raids that everyone enjoys. Uber guilds tend to be much more goal oriented.

[xoverau.livejournal.com]

It still seems like I'd value a prize more if I actually fought difficult odds for it and won, rather than whined until the rules were changed to be easy. I dunno. I'm one of those who doesn't understand the rules against player killing, either, so. :)

[cathexys.livejournal.com]

interesting idea that it's our deepest femaleness showing...

as for the gender bias in games...i've always felt there was a cultural/national thing going on as well...americans seem to be much more competitive than europeans, i'd say (i find that's not only obvious in sports...but also in other aspects...e.g., in academic settings where grading on a curve promotes cut throat competition whereas cheating was not really looked down upon among students in germany whn i was in school but rather seen as working together to defeat the system...) eh...and how did i get from cock sizes to one of my pet theories??? *g* and does that mean germans are more in touch with their feminine side? *g*

and yes, the reciprocal fucking certainly is all about equality, but i think that's one of the (many) reasons we like two guys...both literally and metaphorically we want therm to be able to *play* both sides, to be complete equals, right? (and any bdsm inequality is willingly entered into, not already established...) and yes, i'm stating the obvious...sorry :-) but the play idea is intriguing (and clear not only in your head...)

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

Well, but reciprocal fucking is also all about having a new set of nerve endings to stimulate -- and, better yet, a new set of "first times" to record and enjoy.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

I wonder if that extend-the-play philosophy explains the prominence of mutual orgasms in slash -- because if everybody crosses the finish line at the same time, as it were, then nobody wins.

I think my objection to mutual orgasms is also rooted in an extend-the-play philosophy, in the smutty sense of "Don't tell me it's over already!"

[helvirago]

Yeah, that'd be my argument. On the other hand, I see the switch-off so often that I've started to fetishize those stories in which the characters take (and stick to) top/bottom roles.

As long as it takes a long time.

[thermidor.livejournal.com]

Why, yes. It's the Law of Conservation of Cock Size. C = l times w over pi.

Or something like that.

I think it was in Slash Science 102, right after mineralology and eye color.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

[laughing so hard]

Right, I remember. It was right after the unit on orgasm limitations -- O = (1/age) x (sexiness of partner) / (days since last orgasm)

[laurelwood.livejournal.com]

You're absolutely right. And frequently, the "more slender" one is also "pointed".

[lcsbanana.livejournal.com]

Like a harpoon!

[fearthainn.livejournal.com]

Or a pencil. ;)

[jacquez.livejournal.com]

*scribble*

Dear Diary,

Today I compared my penis to Dan's. His is thicker, but it doesn't have this nifty retractable tip that I can use to write things like shopping lists, diary entries, and my name in the snow. Go me!

Love, Casey.

[http://users.livejournal.com/oceana_/]

Yes, but that'S only what they believe! In reality, they see: Hey, his is bigger, so mine's gotty be thicker!
No, you are right. Though it doesn't bother me as much as these 10 inch cocks.
And I remember I read a Stargate story where Jack sees Daniel naked for the first time and can't believe that he has penis envy over a geek. :-)

[mishamcm.livejournal.com]

Here's Pat Jacquerie's deliberate exception: In Way Of Farewell (http://www.liberated.org.uk/1033inway.htm)

[lasultrix.livejournal.com]

A year and a half of slash-reading, and I've never come across a cock-comparison. Thank Christ.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

You're kidding. It's so common!

Bad writers dwell on it, rhapsodize over it, deliver measurements out to two decimal places. Even good writers, though, will often have a brief comparison in the first moment of nakedness.

[sparrohawk.livejournal.com]

Which makes chaos_rose's "Summer Vacation" (archived at the SSFF (http://www.sockiipress.org/~luthien/snapeff/)) all the more interesting, as it has a threesome.

For the record, Wilkes and Snape are about the same length, though Snape's is thicker (thick enough to be intimidating), and Rosier's is longer than both, but thinner. LOL!

And, might I add, the story is exceptionally hot :D. Get thee hence and read it.

[iibnf.livejournal.com]

Unless you're writing Hagrid slash...

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

Hagrid's probable endowment is a logistical problem to be dealt with, like unto Fraser's knee-high laced boots.

[laurakaye.livejournal.com]

Would this be a bad time to mention my reluctant fascination with the Snape/Hagrid pairing? *g*

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

You do know that iibnf is Bernice, the queen of Snape/Hagrid slash?

[tanzy.livejournal.com]

I'm just waiting for the day I read a slash story where one character has a disproportionately sized cock and his (smaller than avergage) partner is horrified. ;)

"There is no way you're getting anywhere near my ass with THAT. I want to be able to sit down next week, thankyouverymuch."

[yonmei.livejournal.com]

I've read several, mostly in the cruel, cruel world of Blake's 7. (There's one terrific story where Avon sees Blake naked for the first time, his eyes widen, and Blake lies back on the bed reflecting on how difficult it can be to get to have sex when you have an oversized cock. And then they have a typically biting dialogue where Blake sarcastically offers to cut a piece off to make Avon more comfortable. Heh. Not online, unfortunately. Am trying to remember name of author/zine...)

[mamadeb.livejournal.com]

This all goes to fit cesperanza's thing - "Like men, only better."

I remember reading alt.sex.motss.stories, way back when. I didn't have web access, I didn't know how to find slash. All I could find to scratch that itch was amateur gay porn. And they all give that particularly vital statistic - both the viewpoint character (you mostly see first person) and his new best buddy - to the fraction of an inch. In both states.

But only length. I think girth was more "thick". I'm guessing it's all important to the boys.

But. Not the slashboys. Most of the time, they're too enthralled by the sheer beauty of the newly revealed genitals, or too freaked by the idea that they're about to have sex with a *guy* and they *want* it, or too aroused to do anything but get to the action (or distracted by their "soon -to-be lover's" (ugh) cerulean blue eyes) to notice.

Because *we* don't care. :)

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

And they all give that particularly vital statistic - both the viewpoint character (you mostly see first person) and his new best buddy - to the fraction of an inch. In both states.

Yes! I've noticed that at nifty.org. (Shut up. You know you've all been there, too.) They're also fond of totaling up semen quantity and ejaculation distance.

Who knew sex was so mathematical?

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Just for you, I will include the exchange,

"Well, whaddya know? We're exactly the same size!"
"Yeah, how about that? Get over here and stand next to me and let me make sure..."

... in a future fic.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

How ... kind of you.

Wizards being wizards (actually I mean wizards being men), they've probably developed some precise measuring spell.

[yonmei.livejournal.com]

Not always.

There's an adorable sequence of stories by Predatrix where Avon, Blake, and Gan are having a threesome: Gan's cock is very large, and comments made in fact establish that Avon's cock is slightly smaller than Blake's. (These are locker-room style teasing, not straightforward "Here, let's do a size check.")

Never written a size check scene myself. When I was younger I didn't see the point, and now that I'm older I do, but I still don't write them.

[spring-1970.livejournal.com]

I have a question - why does anyone talk about penis size or descriptions at all in slash? It's a penis. It looks like a penis. That's all. Why do people want to describe them in such detail at all?!?

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

It's a penis. It looks like a penis. That's all. Why do people want to describe them in such detail at all?!?

Beats me. I don't even get why people want to describe the beloved's hair color.

[spring-1970.livejournal.com]

Oh no - my favs are when they describe the pubic hair colour.

Oh yeah, I needed *that*.

[askance.livejournal.com]

Why don't they ever notice the bend in the other guy's cock?

Are banana dicks unfashionable in slash today?

[goseaward.livejournal.com]

And waaaay later than everyone else...

Then there are the lovely Snarry stories where Harry's been checking out the boys in the locker room, but those were boys, and Snape is a man and therefore huge and intimidating.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

Oh, how I hate that. I want to grab the writer and say, Do you want to make me feel dirty just for reading your story?